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Sledging is part and parcel of cricket but here you a few
classic comebacks. How true they are is another thing but
enjoy none the less.
1. Rod Marsh & Ian
Botham: When Botham took guard in an Ashes match, Marsh
welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal words: "So
how's your wife & my kids?"
2. Daryll Cullinan
& Shane Warne: As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket,
Warne told him he had been waiting 2 years for another chance
to humiliate him. "Looks like you spent it eating," Cullinan
retorted.
3. Glenn McGrath
(bowling to portly Zimbabwean chicken farmer Eddo Brandes):
"Hey Eddo, why are you so F**ing Fat?" Eddo Brandes: "Because
everytime I F*** your mother, she gives me a biscuit"
4. Robin Smith &
Merv Hughes during 1989 Lords Test Hughes said to Smith
after he played& missed:"You can't f**king bat". Smith to
Hughes after he smacked him to theboundary: "Hey Merv, we
make a fine pair. I can't f**king bat & you can't f**king
bowl."
5. Merv Hughes &
Javed Miandad during 1991 Adelaide Test, Javed called
Merv a fat bus conductor. A few balls later Merv dismissed
Javed: "Tickets please", Merv called out as he ran past
the departing batsman.
6. Merv Hughes &
Viv Richards during a test match in the West Indies,
Hughes didn't say a word to Viv, but continued to stare
at him after deliveries. "This is my island, my culture.
Don't you be staring at me. In my culture we just bowl."
Merv didn't reply, but after he dismissed him he announced
to the batsman: "In my culture we just say f**k *ff."
7. Ian Healy
his legendary comment which was picked up by the Channel
9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner
on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney...
"You don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit,
fat cunt!!!"
8. James Ormond
had just come out to bat on an ashes tour and was greeted
by Mark Waugh....... MW : "F*ck me, look who it is. Mate,
what are you doing out here, there's no way you're good
enough to play for England" JO : "Maybe not, but at least
i'm the best player in my family"
9. McGrath to Ramnaresh
Sarwan: "So what does Brian Lara's d*ck taste like?"
Sarwan: "I don't know. Ask your wife." McGrath (losing it):
"If you ever effing mention my wife again, I'll F*ing rip
your F*fing throat out."
10. Mark Waugh
standing at second slip, the new player (Adam Parore) comes
to the crease playing & missing the first ball. Mark - "Ohh,
I remember you from a couple years ago in Australia. You
were shit then you're fu*king useless now". Parore- (Turning
around) "Yeah, that's me & when I was there you were going
out with that old, ugly sl*t & now I hear you've married
her. You dumb c*nt".
11. Yet another
Australian witticism with this time porky Sri Lankan batsman
Arjuna Ranatunga the victim. Shane Warne, trying to tempt
the batsman out of his crease mused what it took to get
the plump character to get out of his crease and drive.
Wicketkeeper Ian Healy piped up, "Put a Mars Bar on a good
length. That should do it."
12. Ravi Shastri
v/s the aussie 12th man .Shastri hits it to this guy
and looks for a single...this guy gets the ball in and says
"if you leave the crease i'll break your f***ing head" Shastri:
"if you could bat as well as you can talk you wouldn't be
the f***ing 12th man"
13. Malcolm Marshall
was bowling to David Boon who had played and missed a couple
of times. Marshall : "Now David, Are you going to get out
now or am I going to have to bowl around the wicket and
kill you?"
14. Fred Trueman.
The batsman edges and the ball goes to first slip,and right
between Raman Subba Row's legs. Fred doesn't say a word.
At the end of the over, Row ambles past Trueman and apologises
sheepishly. "I should've kept my legs together, Fred". "So
should your mother" he replied.
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